Me: “Hey sweetheart, I’m reading this article, and it has some good points about why the zombie apocalypse isn’t something we need to worry about.”

Husband: “Really? Why’s that?”

Me: “Because of the weather here! Zombies would freeze in the winter since they don’t have any blood circulation! Plus, the National Guard is right near here, so they could shoot the zombies down.”

Husband: “I love you.”

Me: “I love you, too!”

Husband: “I’m so glad you’re aware of the zombie threat and are looking ahead to our options.”

(Bridal Store | Taylorsville, UT, USA)

(I’m an overweight woman, who has always struggled with weight due to a non-functioning thyroid. I struggle to find a store that caters to larger brides until I find this one, so I go to see what they have. There’s a large woman (probably about 5’5 and 350-380 pounds) on the stage in the center of the room having a fitting done. I’m browsing the catalogs when I hear an exchange between a daughter and her mother and the manager. The daughter is a thin girl who appears spoiled with how she talks. The daughter is staring at the larger woman on the stage, and leans in to her mother.)

Daughter: “I can’t believe someone like her is actually getting married!”

Mother: “I didn’t think whales mated for life!”

(The bride-to-be has clearly heard the comments, and is looking devastated. She takes a step away from the manager who is doing the fitting, but the manager stops her and walks up to the mother and daughter.)

Manager: “I can’t believe you think you’re going to get a dress from my store.”

Daughter: “Well, joke’s on you then, because I’m actually here to pick it up! Besides, I’ve already paid.”

Manager: “Oh, you’re picking up your order? What’s the name?”

Mother: “It’s [Name].”

Manager: “Alright…”

(The manager goes behind the counter, counter taps some things on the register, and then hands a receipt.)

Manager: “I need you to sign this.”

Mother: “What’s this?”

(The mother signs anyway.)

Manager: “That’s you signing that you have accepted a full refund for your purchase. You can find another store to get your dresses at. I just cancelled your order and am refusing you service. Now leave before I call the police.”

Daughter: “YOU CAN’T DO THIS! MY WEDDING IS IN NEXT WEEK! HOW DARE YOU!”

(The daughter starts throwing things around.)

Mother: “We had those dresses custom made! How could you cancel her order! Look at her!”

Manager: “I cancelled the order because I am not going to let any bride feel like she’s not worthy of marriage just because of her size. Clearly you both feel that you are better than others, and I have no place for clients that are, frankly, a**-holes. I’m calling the police, and since I still have your card information, I’m going to charge you for whatever damages your daughter causes.”

(The manager picks up the phone. The mother grabs her daughter and they rush out of the door. I ended up buying my dress from them, and it was BEAUTIFUL! Turns out the manager has a daughter who has a severe thyroid disease and has struggled with weight as well!)